Quality Assurance Takes Dedication

Being totally honest, if you are employed to manage the professional quality standards aspect of your company, then you are likely to face a fairly sizeable amount of daily stress. Having already trained to implement and then achieve an ISO standard, you will then have had to maintain and monitor, in order to reap the benefits of said ISO.

Here at Rallivo we understand a little humour goes a long way, so this article is dedicated to those who need a smile or two in between sub-clauses and definitions.

ISO Urban Myth

Yes, you have probably heard it before, but it is a good one. Obviously, someone in this story would benefit from the ISO family of standards.

The story of the aerospace company and the automobile company, who decided to have a competitive boat race on the Potomac river. The teams relentlessly trained to peak physical fitness and honed their strategies.

On race day, the automobile team were victorious.

Following on from this defeat, the aerospace team were morose and dejected. Management came to the conclusion that a system should be put in place and formed a “Continuous Measurable Improvement” team; to assess the loss and put remedial suggestions and positive plans of action into motion.

They concluded that the automobile team had eight rowers with one cox, whilst the aerospace team had one rower and eight people shouting directions. The aerospace team spurred on by this, hired an expert consultant to dissect the management structure and make some recommendations. In a lickety-split they were presented with a report, showing they had not enough rowers and too many steering the boat!

Armed with this knowledge, the aerospace team proceeded to the next race day proudly parading their four new Steering Managers, three Area Steering Managers, one Staff Steering Manager and a new set of incentives, to encourage the rower to work harder. Confidence was high that they would reach their premium quality management goal and steal the trophy from the car builders.

On race day, the car builders won by an even larger margin.

After a few days of awkward silence and general all around humiliation and misery, the aerospace company laid off the rower following his poor performance. Sold off the boat and paddles, cancelled the order for a new boat, cut all investment in new kit and awarded the consultancy firm with a high-performance achievement award. They then shared the money saved and distributed it as a year-end bonus to senior executives.

And Finally…

ISO 9000 is a globally recognised family of standards, except for the residents of Beverley Hills, who use ISO 90210. ISO SO – not a full blown punishable non-conformance, just merely getting by…